Red Pine Progession, 11 years

james

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Here is a Red pine progression, getting close to completion. Critique welcome. Sorry if images are big, haven't figured out yet how to easily make smaller.

tree32.jpg

2004, $5 nursery tree, initial styling 5 years earlier

DSCN3792.jpg

2005, second styling

Nikonpicstofile11-13116.jpg

2007, new pot, jin lowest branch, refinement, needle reduction started

DSC_0591.jpg

2008, new pot, further refinement

DSC_0115.jpg

2011

Needs some root work, potentially smaller pot, further ramification, more needle work. Other suggestions?
 
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I like it... personally I think something reguarding the ballance is a little off... I added another pad on the lower left to give you a possible idea... nice though !!!
Also, I agree with a slightly smaller pot...
 

james

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Stacy,

Thank you for your thoughts, interesting idea. As I am a bit new to this post, can you tell me how you:

1. got the thumbnail images?
2. how you (so quickly) modified the image, illustrating your point?

Thanks, James
 

Brian Van Fleet

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Nice development and refinement here; particularly between 08 and 11. Taller suits the trunk better than wider, and it looks like you're taking it that direction. It's a nice bunjin, so not to be critical, but here are 3 considerations:

1. Continue to make it taller than wider and capitalize on the slender trunk line.

2. If it was rotated slightly counter-clockwise, would it improve the movement of the tachigari? It's a little pigeon-breasted in the last photo.

3. As it ages, it may be good to remove the 2nd and 3rd branches, separating and accentuating the primary left branch...but the impact of that is hard to see in a 2D photo.

Red pines are not common around here, and can make stunning bonsai. Thanks for posting, welcome!!!
 
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james, I did the work in photoshop, and when reloading the image, when you are doing a posting use the "go advance" section and click on the attachment button, the paper clip icon. This method will let you post up to five pics at a time...
 

james

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Brian,

Thank you for your thoughts...

I would agree, this tree wants to be, or could be bunjin. I might not be ready to take the plunge just yet.

That being said, I think the suggestion by you and Stacy to emphasize the lowest left branch, potentially with a new dropping pad is a nice idea. At present, the trunkline in back at base, and forward from there up, so no pigean breast. I recognize this is hard to perceive with 2d images.

Lastly, branches 2 and 3 head to the back. I see your point about cleaning the image with taking them out, (heading to bunjin) haven't yet got there, as they currently fill out the back. I could possibly give needed depth with some of the other branches.

Much to think about, thank you two! James
 

Smoke

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I don't know if bunjin is right for this trunk. By taking off the lower branching and keeping the top, it would emphasize the unnatural zigzagging of that upper trunk. While the image now still has the unnatural upper trunk it looks OK since the larger lower branches help diguise it.

Just another opinion, Al
 

bonsaiTOM

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James, I like your tree a lot. I would simply continue to lower the left branch, a bit thicker if possible, but keep the tip slightly upward - as Ryan Neal recommends.
NICE.
 

tanlu

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I agree that the zig-zag is a tad predictable and not conducive to literati. This can only become a literati if you cut off everything but the first branch, and perhaps leave a jin.

If you plan on keeping it an informal upright, have the first two branches descend a bit more to add some more character. I would also find a way to thicken the trunk and lower branches a bit more.
 

james

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Thank you

Thank you for all the positive comments...

Also, I believe there is a consensus, that as is, the upper trunk movement is too predictable to lend to bunjin at this time. Some of the zig-zag has been softened in the last minor rewiring I did after the last picture.

So fo now, will work on filling in lower branches, and bringing down branch on left. All relatively easily done.

Thanks all, will keep you updated. James
 

Indoor Trees

Yamadori
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Nice work Grasshopper. You are good at bonsai and photography.
 

Djtommy

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nice so far,
i think @Brian Van Fleet s comment still goes to keep the with of the tree in check. maybe a bit more asymmetry to the left as well. as now the foliage looks a bit heavy for the still slender trunk. that one barked up nicely.
i dont really like the pot for this tree though. but looking good so far
 

JudyB

Queen of the Nuts
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Awesome job. It’s great for people to see what perseverance can do, that and patience. I like the image, but think it might be better in a different pot.
 

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