Small neelde yama pine.

Stan Kengai

Omono
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Nice material. You look to have done a good bit of work on it. My personal opinion, but I liked the original trunk orientation. It gave the tree a laid back, relaxed feeling. The new orientation seems to accentuate the long straight middle section of the trunk, and it feels forced, unnatural. However, this may be spectacular once the branches develop. I don't have a visionary mind and tend to go for the easy conservative style.
 

Bonsai Nut

Nuttier than your average Nut
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@Stan Kengai I tend to agree with you, but it is pretty subtle. How about this? I split the difference between the original angle and the new angle - trying to keep any part of the trunk from being completely vertical. It also brings the apex back over the pot. If you kept this angle, you would want to shift the tree left in the pot a bit as well...

virt.jpg
 

Adair M

Pinus Envy
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Well, several things...

It appears to me that a lot of branches were removed as a part of the restyle. All the little ones are gone, and the larger ones remain. Now, maybe it’s because you used heavy aluminum wire, it makes the branches look fat, relative to the thickness of the trunk. On a tall thin trunk, thin branches are more in proportion. Hopefully, it’s the wire making them look fatter than they actually are.

Then, it also appears there’s been a lot of foliage close to the trunk removed. Several of the remaining branches have long sections of bare branch, with the foliage way out on the ends. And the canopy is wide. Tall thin trunks usually have shorter branches with foliage closer to the trunk. That lower right branch should be brought back in towards the trunk by bribing it down more.

And then, there’s the pot. You’ve selected a literati style tree, but you’re using a relatively deep oval. Maybe this is a halfway between nursery can and final pot. But it would look better in a round pot. But... if planted in an oval, it should have been planted on the other side! The key branch is the lower right. The tree should have been potted so that the key branch was over the most soil, not over thin air.

Of course, it will look better after new foliage has come in!

Good luck with it!
 

sorce

Nonsense Rascal
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I agree with everything.....

Though, I didn't notice the straight trunk part since the foilage is placed so well.

I think putting a slight bend in that first branch may take the "straight straight" from bringing attention to the straight trunk.
It seems only the trunk section directly across from the straight branch is wholly uninteresting.

Pot? Hell yeah! Hash and Dabs!

50# of the Dark Brown...
50# of the Dark Red....

Dirty dirty Sorceround!

Sorce
 

Giga

Masterpiece
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it's not bad, just need all the foliage you removed to fill back in and next go round a slight forward and to the left planting angle.
 
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Thanks you all for the feedback. Really gives me an other point off view on this one. i'm going to change the angel of the tree, like the virt. Way better movement.

On this picture i just repotted the tree and made some branch selection, on a workshop with bjorn.
IMG_5435.JPG
It had a slow start that year and lost piece of that lower branch.
I didn't cut the foliage that was close too the trunk. Still working on back budding
IMG_7996.JPG
If those branches are too thick. It doesn't irritate or something like that too me.
IMG_7997.JPG
The way the branches leaving the trunk, should be done different.

:)
 

Vance Wood

Lord Mugo
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I don't do virtuals much anymore I find that the results to be less than appreciated but this one I could not resist. In short this tree the way it is, has way more growth and mass in foliage than the trunk suggest it should have. This virtual accents the trunk a bit more with less foliage and better placement. I do not know or understand the reason my image copied 3 times here. Just look at it once, just look at it once, and just look at it once.

virtA.jpgvirtA.jpgvirtA.jpg
 
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The first idea went true my mind also. second idea i don't like that much. I got that idea on Facebook from somebody. (not compleet exactly)
Schermafbeelding 2018-02-20 om 14.11.37.png
thanks for your virts.
trunk is 2 inch.
 

DirkvanDreven

Shohin
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I like both virts of mister Vance Wood. In the second virt the tree needs to be tilted a little I think. May the owest bend can be made bigger. I really like this tree!
 
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