Thinking about the seriousness of my addiction.

Fidur

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Today there was a wind storm (over 90km/h). It's not usual here (damn climate change). I was away from home, and when I came back, I could see that among other damage one of the panels of my fence fell, and dragged 5 of my bonsai (not my super favorites) with it, and despite falling to the ground, as the pots were made of plastic, no major damage except a few broken branches. The trees affected are the first 5 bottom to top in the second pic
And yet, I feel sad and depressed (there are still 3 days of storm left). Being away from home and thinking about the damage that the wind could cause, I have felt helpless and unhappy. And to think that 15 months ago I didn't have bonsai and I wouldn't have cared about the storm....
This addiction has symptoms equivalent to quitting drugs.
How do you manage this kind of animic situations?


IMG_20220314_182402.jpg IMG_20220314_182728.jpg
 

Wires_Guy_wires

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A professor I worked for used a piece of philosophy on his students when they were worried and distraught with the covid pandemic.
He asked them: Tell me, what can you control about this situation? Does it matter for the whole situation as it is right now, that you are in control of those things? Do you, right now, have more or less control than you did before, and if so, why?
He then explained: there are big things happening, things that we can't control. They will happen either way, even if we wouldn't be on this world, it would be happening right now to someone. We can worry about this, we can feel bad and that's alright. But we also have to look at the things we can control, how we do control them and how there's still so much to enjoy about life.

My sister loves watering my trees. And she takes every chance she gets to help me out. But she's a clumsy 27 year old human being and her ADHD is way worse than mine - she thinks five steps ahead but only remembers the fifth step, so when she waters she only cares about the watering wand and she doesn't think about the garden hose attached to it. This means she knocks over 5 pots a year. Expensive ones, with very high personal value trees in them. I've been angry, I've been mad. But since last year I see these accidents as tests for my horticultural skills. They're challenges that pop up.
I found apple cedar rust in some of my junipers. Which is a wonderful invitation to learn more about it.

You can't change the weather. It'll always be there, as a friend or as an enemy. This time it was your friend, it didn't hurt you physically and it'll test your patience and skill. It'll teach you how to plan for unforseen circumstances in the future. It's not always going to be that way. But that's how it is.
 

Fidur

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A professor I worked for used a piece of philosophy on his students when they were worried and distraught with the covid pandemic.
He asked them: Tell me, what can you control about this situation? Does it matter for the whole situation as it is right now, that you are in control of those things? Do you, right now, have more or less control than you did before, and if so, why?
He then explained: there are big things happening, things that we can't control. They will happen either way, even if we wouldn't be on this world, it would be happening right now to someone. We can worry about this, we can feel bad and that's alright. But we also have to look at the things we can control, how we do control them and how there's still so much to enjoy about life.

My sister loves watering my trees. And she takes every chance she gets to help me out. But she's a clumsy 27 year old human being and her ADHD is way worse than mine - she thinks five steps ahead but only remembers the fifth step, so when she waters she only cares about the watering wand and she doesn't think about the garden hose attached to it. This means she knocks over 5 pots a year. Expensive ones, with very high personal value trees in them. I've been angry, I've been mad. But since last year I see these accidents as tests for my horticultural skills. They're challenges that pop up.
I found apple cedar rust in some of my junipers. Which is a wonderful invitation to learn more about it.

You can't change the weather. It'll always be there, as a friend or as an enemy. This time it was your friend, it didn't hurt you physically and it'll test your patience and skill. It'll teach you how to plan for unforseen circumstances in the future. It's not always going to be that way. But that's how it is.

Absolutly yes, you're right.
As I wrote the initial post, I begun to think the way you explain and instantly felt the bright side of it. I will be checking the fence hardware. :)
 

Arnold

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Sorry about the damage, here in my zone only heavy rain not wind but in other places crazy wind! in el Hierro 140 km/h winds (87 mph)
 

Colorado

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Today there was a wind storm (over 90km/h). It's not usual here (damn climate change). I was away from home, and when I came back, I could see that among other damage one of the panels of my fence fell, and dragged 5 of my bonsai (not my super favorites) with it, and despite falling to the ground, as the pots were made of plastic, no major damage except a few broken branches. The trees affected are the first 5 bottom to top in the second pic
And yet, I feel sad and depressed (there are still 3 days of storm left). Being away from home and thinking about the damage that the wind could cause, I have felt helpless and unhappy. And to think that 15 months ago I didn't have bonsai and I wouldn't have cared about the storm....
This addiction has symptoms equivalent to quitting drugs.
How do you manage this kind of animic situations?


View attachment 424422 View attachment 424423

I have felt similar feelings. I understand where you are coming from. I think we just have to accept that some hazards are out of our control, and work to mitigate what we can!

Bonsai can definitely be stressful…if you allow it to be. :)
 

HorseloverFat

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Addiction and obsession are different... Remember this... Addiction is almost always negative... and self-defeating.
;)
I remember that stage.. (Ever growing, all-consuming, maddening Bonsai obsession)

I only recently ..."came down".. 😂

There were MANY observations..

But probably not a single HELPFUL one... becaaause.. Obsessions don't need "help".. they need "guidance".

Focus and control can allow one to "wield" obsession, effectively.

..

Just enjoy the ride, friend..

Things "even out"..

🤓
 

JudyB

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Yes there are things that cannot be controlled, and stress is a very unhappy thing for you. I myself would be looking at how I can protect the trees if I am not there from any variety of issues. I live on a hill where wind is a problem sometimes, so I have a place to put all the trees in when I'm away to make them as safe as possible. If a tornado comes, then nothing will stop it, but short of that, or a tree falling on the structure, then I've done all I can and I feel good about going away and don't stress. If you are handy, I'm sure you can make something to allow yourself to enjoy your time away instead of worrying about what is happening at home.
 

Carol 83

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A professor I worked for used a piece of philosophy on his students when they were worried and distraught with the covid pandemic.
He asked them: Tell me, what can you control about this situation? Does it matter for the whole situation as it is right now, that you are in control of those things? Do you, right now, have more or less control than you did before, and if so, why?
He then explained: there are big things happening, things that we can't control. They will happen either way, even if we wouldn't be on this world, it would be happening right now to someone. We can worry about this, we can feel bad and that's alright. But we also have to look at the things we can control, how we do control them and how there's still so much to enjoy about life.

My sister loves watering my trees. And she takes every chance she gets to help me out. But she's a clumsy 27 year old human being and her ADHD is way worse than mine - she thinks five steps ahead but only remembers the fifth step, so when she waters she only cares about the watering wand and she doesn't think about the garden hose attached to it. This means she knocks over 5 pots a year. Expensive ones, with very high personal value trees in them. I've been angry, I've been mad. But since last year I see these accidents as tests for my horticultural skills. They're challenges that pop up.
I found apple cedar rust in some of my junipers. Which is a wonderful invitation to learn more about it.

You can't change the weather. It'll always be there, as a friend or as an enemy. This time it was your friend, it didn't hurt you physically and it'll test your patience and skill. It'll teach you how to plan for unforseen circumstances in the future. It's not always going to be that way. But that's how it is.
What a lovely way of saying shit happens, deal with it and carry on, things could be worse.
 

Coppersdad

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Addiction or obsession, do the words matter in this case? If your love of our shared fascination with trees in pots does not affect anyone but you, what's the problem?
I make an assumption your bonsai work does not bring harm to any living thing except your trees. I hope your bonsai obsession doesn't impair your ability to feed yourself and those you might be responsible for feeding. If your bonsai practice is not breaking and laws, what's the big deal?

Life is short. Embrace your love. Enjoy your sweetheart. Love your passion. 😁
 

John P.

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Our “gardeners” … who are really just blow-and-go guys, just knocked over two of my trees last week. I got on their case for doing this in the past. Clearly they are moving too fast or just don’t give a damn.

I have the same anger … but I’m paying the problem in my case.

And then I relax and try to put it in perspective (Ukraine and all). That helps.

A little, anyway.
 

ShadyStump

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I have no trees worth showing, even to friends. Over the past year I've lost everything I had before then, but they were of the same quality. Until the past 6 months I never actually invested myself in bonsai, for many reasons, but I still enjoyed it. Now I'm pretty much starting my life from scratch, including my trees.

When the time comes that I lose a tree worth speaking of, I'll remind myself of now. I'll remember driving and pulling over because I spotted a nursery pot in the ditch, or my aching back after hours pounding bricks and lava rock into bits for soil because I can't afford to buy it, or the blisters and cuts from digging a tree I never should have tried to get.
I'll remind myself that the trees I lose are always less important than the trees I still have. If I somehow lose all of them, they're still less important than the ones I'm going to get.
 

cockroach

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Absolutly yes, you're right.
As I wrote the initial post, I begun to think the way you explain and instantly felt the bright side of it. I will be checking the fence hardware. :)
I had some bigger trees damaged in a typhon years ago. The effort and work to get them back in pots, shifted and filled made me realize my bonsai passion lies more in smaller trees. Trees I can pick up and admire.
 

Shibui

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A branch broken off a tree is a chance to reassess the style and see how it can be improved.
Often my trees do not improve because I have been stuck in a rut and can only see what is. Accident can force me out of the rut to look at what could be.

Try to see disaster as an opportunity.
 

penumbra

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I have no trees worth showing, even to friends. Over the past year I've lost everything I had before then, but they were of the same quality. Until the past 6 months I never actually invested myself in bonsai, for many reasons, but I still enjoyed it. Now I'm pretty much starting my life from scratch, including my trees.

When the time comes that I lose a tree worth speaking of, I'll remind myself of now. I'll remember driving and pulling over because I spotted a nursery pot in the ditch, or my aching back after hours pounding bricks and lava rock into bits for soil because I can't afford to buy it, or the blisters and cuts from digging a tree I never should have tried to get.
I'll remind myself that the trees I lose are always less important than the trees I still have. If I somehow lose all of them, they're still less important than the ones I'm going to get.
I was going to post that the most relevant thing is the journey itself, but the above says this eloquently. ^^^^
 

Zerobear

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I have no trees worth showing, even to friends. Over the past year I've lost everything I had before then, but they were of the same quality. Until the past 6 months I never actually invested myself in bonsai, for many reasons, but I still enjoyed it. Now I'm pretty much starting my life from scratch, including my trees.

When the time comes that I lose a tree worth speaking of, I'll remind myself of now. I'll remember driving and pulling over because I spotted a nursery pot in the ditch, or my aching back after hours pounding bricks and lava rock into bits for soil because I can't afford to buy it, or the blisters and cuts from digging a tree I never should have tried to get.
I'll remind myself that the trees I lose are always less important than the trees I still have. If I somehow lose all of them, they're still less important than the ones I'm going to get.
Your situation sounds a lot like mine. 15-16 years back, we lived in a different city and I was pushing full speed on the final days of my working career.

For the second time in my life, I had quite a few trees and spent a lot of time and effort on them. Then, over the course of a few months I encountered several very serious health problems and while devoting all of my attention to surviving them, I managed, through lack of attention, to lose all of my bonsai collection. I never stopped thinking about my trees, I guess I just changed how important they were to me. Now I am back to enjoying them, with the understanding that someone else will finish a lot of what I have started this time around.

I guess that is one thing that makes bonsai different from many other desires or passions. Our best efforts may never be accomplished to what we envision. Hopefully someone else will be able to take what we do and carry it forward. As for my collection, enjoying them today is more than enough for me.

I'm not sure where that came from. I think I'll have another cup of coffee and enjoy the rainy late winter day this one will be.
 
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Paradox

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I have no trees worth showing, even to friends. Over the past year I've lost everything I had before then, but they were of the same quality. Until the past 6 months I never actually invested myself in bonsai, for many reasons, but I still enjoyed it. Now I'm pretty much starting my life from scratch, including my trees.

When the time comes that I lose a tree worth speaking of, I'll remind myself of now. I'll remember driving and pulling over because I spotted a nursery pot in the ditch, or my aching back after hours pounding bricks and lava rock into bits for soil because I can't afford to buy it, or the blisters and cuts from digging a tree I never should have tried to get.
I'll remind myself that the trees I lose are always less important than the trees I still have. If I somehow lose all of them, they're still less important than the ones I'm going to get.

The trees you lose are very important in that they should be teaching you what you did wrong so that the trees you are going to get have a better chance at surviving.
You need to learn the lesson they all can tell you.
 
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