Any bonsai conspiracy theorists out there?

[Paradox]

There is no bonsai soil other than Haydite.

The haydite from a very specific mine in NY is laced with mind altering drugs transferred through air and physical contact to make us all into mindless drones.

 

[rockm]

That's not the grassy knoll. I'd show you where the boxwoods aren't, but that wouldn't help.

im familiar. Been there dozens of times. Hell, some of my relatives worked only a block away from there on that day.

 

[Cajunrider]

im familiar. Been there dozens of times. Hell, some of my relatives worked only a block away from there on that day.

Proof that we got conspirators among us and they already sniffed us out.

 

[yashu]

There is no bonsai soil other than Haydite.

It’s Schrodinger‘s bonsai soil!?!?!?

 

[yashu]

It’s Schrodinger‘s bonsai soil!?!?!?

… until you look in the pot during repotting season anyway.

 

[BillsBayou]

Proof that we got conspirators among us and they already sniffed us out.
View attachment 545403

I looked, but I cannot find the "Sluɘbөk". Not sure what it does. Bet it's nefarious.

 

[NaoTK]

Did not expect to change my avatar today but happy it happened

 

[Wulfskaar]

Trick's on you, Japan!

With every scoop of akadama you send to the US, Japan gets smaller and the US gets larger!

We are slowly stealing Japan from under their feet!

 

[BillsBayou]

Trick's on you, Japan!

With every scoop of akadama you send to the US, Japan gets smaller and the US gets larger!

We are slowly stealing Japan from under their feet!

{ring} "Hello, Akadama Exports. How can I help you?"
"This is your emperor. Why are my feet wet?"

 

[Cajunrider]

{ring} "Hello, Akadama Exports. How can I help you?"
"This is your emperor. Why are my feet wet?"

This won't happen until we import enough to form Akadamian mountain range.

 

[Michael P]

Bonsai are definitely part of the Homosexual Agenda to undermine American masculinity.

 

[BillsBayou]

Bonsai are definitely part of the Homosexual Agenda to undermine American masculinity.

Soybean plants make great bonsai.

 

[BillsBayou]

I may have already said too much. Artificial Intelligence gave me a threatening image. The prompt was "Looking up at a bonsai tree", illustration style. The image is attached. It has not been altered by me in any way.

Somehow, They are sending me a message.

 

[rusticana]

There is no bonsai soil other than Haydite.

What? You guys aren't using crushed up space rock for bonsai soil?

 

[BillsBayou]

What? You guys aren't using crushed up space rock for bonsai soil?

That's just Moon Haydite. The lunar base on the other side of the moon has a kiln. They're mining water and creating Haydite at the same time.

 

[rusticana]

Bonsai are definitely part of the Homosexual Agenda to undermine American masculinity.

Well when if you look at some of those old japanese pornographic paintings and compare it to the trunk chop obsession? It could be at least penis envy?

 

[NaoTK]

You guys ever scratch the patina of your pots and smoke it? What's in our water?!

 

[Weta]

No no no,
I'm working with Southwoods not operating on Northwoods.

 

[Cadillactaste]

There's a secret cabal out there. They influence the direction of the art to meet Their own agenda. Worse, They use bonsai to advance a political agenda. Before They shut down this thread or have me silenced for suggesting They exist, what have you heard? Will you dare to speak out about Them?

I'll begin. The grassy knoll wasn't always grassy. Someone got in there and collected the boxwoods to clear the sniper's view. Every now and then, a progress photo leaks out. These boxwood bonsai aren't supposed to exist. 60 years later, if knowledge came to light that bonsai had a roll in the JFK assassination, it would expose too many collections to government seizure.

... what kind of brownies are you eating?

 

[Cadillactaste]

View attachment 545397

Now that brought on a proper gut laugh!